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taking it personal..       #: 713
 Moderated by: Mike69, MaDMaXX,
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 Posted: Wed Mar 21st, 2018 12:30 am
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Undrstm8ed
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Sorry a couple beers aren't cutting it right now with the rest of the voices in my head.


Anyone have any experiences in life where an ex-wife / significant other with a history of health issues following a stroke or other serious issue of sorts whom even after a decade still has custody of/some of your children where the health is taking a turn for the worst and the outcome may be an undetermined time of a possible new summer job of pushing up daisies?

I don't have all the information, but my oldest son got a disturbing but humbling text today from his mother whom he doesn't talk to with an "I'm sorry for what ever I did" and a vague bad news stemming from a test that didn't leave high hopes or good news and requiring further tests to get a more defined answer...

Sorry for the blurted out run on sentences.

I have nothing cordial for this woman.. by many standards, just contempt and animosity for her trespasses in my life but life for my boys is about to change dramatically and I feel ill prepared for it. I don't know whats really wrong or if she's over reacting in typical knee jerk fashion but I've not known her to ever take her health issues lightly. Usually if its bad, its bad. She's a lot of unkind things [to me], but shes not dramatic about her health.

Not sure what to make of it at all if at all but the news for the last hr is brewing some anxieties........



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 Posted: Wed Mar 21st, 2018 06:21 am
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1qaz
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Hang in there Man.  Take each moment at it comes.  Your boys need you...be there for them.  Plan what you can.  Keep a level head for the rest and make the best decisions you can at the time you need to make them.  Stay strong.

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 Posted: Wed Mar 21st, 2018 07:50 am
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NoPower

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Sorry for your dilemma, I know most of us are not fond of the X, I hope that she not playing a sick game, Keep an open mind and be there for your boys. In time the truth will come out. No matter the out come she has to answer to only one higher power.



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 Posted: Wed Mar 21st, 2018 09:54 am
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JAMMAN

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I've got 2..........

My son from my second just came to live with me a little over a year ago. Just before he turned 20.

Some times you just have to wait. Courts lean toward the female parent in just about every state I know regardless of their health or mental status.



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 Posted: Wed Mar 21st, 2018 10:49 am
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squirrelhunter
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Like others have said,just hang in there and be there for your sons.



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 Posted: Wed Mar 21st, 2018 01:09 pm
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That all sucks quite a bit.

Turns out I do have some history with my ex.  My son has a particularly contentious relationship with her.  He has gone years a couple of times with not speaking to her.  With me she even went as far as falsifying work records to avoid paying child support.  A letter from my lawyer to her employer changed that.  Now she has fibromyalgia, hasn't worked for years, and was about too default on her mortgage.  My son made her payments for a couple of months, while he bought her house.  He just closed, and she got $50k in hand and her husband got the same.  He got a great deal at that, but it will be work.  She was basically a hoarder the last 5 years.  

What it came down to for me, was never bad mouth her to him.  Never say anything bad that he could hear, let him make his own decisions.  Just do your best for your kids, and trust their intelligence and the morals that you have tried to instill in them.  90% of the time they will see what reality is eventually.  It's not always an easy road though...

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